Late this afternoon I was at the nail salon when I got a call from my 11 year old daughter Sophie. I grabbed my cell phone and excitedly said, "Hi honey! How's your vacation going?" Just a few days ago, Sophie was offered an amazing opportunity. Her best friend invited her to go to St Thomas in the Virgin Islands, all expenses paid. She was told to just bring some "kickin' around money." Within 48 hours she was on a plane (first class no less) and on her way to paradise. I was dying to hear how her trip was going. I think I was secretly hoping she was missing her mama (just a little bit.) After listening to her tales of swimming with turtles, I could hear her bff whisper into Sophie's ear, and a little side conversation took place. "Just ASK her!" Sophie came back on the phone and said, "Mom, can I get my belly button pierced tomorrow?"
"What? Are you kidding me? Absolutely NOT!"
"But why not? Mackenzie is!"
I didn't want the entire nail salon hearing me do a freak out, so I lowered my head and hissed into the phone: "If you think I'm letting my 11 year old daughter get her belly button pierced, you are outta your ever-lovin' mind."
She pouted and sulked and barely mumbled a good-bye before she hung up.
I looked up and met the eyes of a few of the other mothers in the salon. They gave me a sympathetic nod and half smile. "So did I miss a trend here?" I asked them. "Do middle school girls actually have their belly buttons pierced now?" I was shocked when I was told that while it's not the everyday norm, it's certainly not uncommon to see.
What the hell... I was, in a rare moment, speechless. I don't even think she has pit hair yet... how can she even be contemplating getting her belly button pierced?
And what I think shocked me just as much - how did I miss a trend as important as this? I had always vowed to be the "cool" mom. I mean, I listen to Usher and Pitbull, I'm on Facebook, I know who Justin Bieber is, I shop at the mall and I wouldn't be caught dead in "mom jeans." One time I had brought my 4 kids up to my friend's house, who also has 4 kids. We went to college together and we get together at least once a year with all our 8 kids. We had a lot of fun living together in our sorority house. We thought we were all that and a bag of chips. Actually, we still do. Anyway, at our last get-together I had given her a framed photo of us at some house party up at college. We were looking at it and reminiscing, when one of her daughters looked at it and sneered. "Did you two think you were, like, POPULAR or something like that?"
My friend and I were outraged. "Oh we were popular all right! Everyone wanted to hang around us. We were so much fun!" Her daughter laughed and said, "Oh sure you were."
I'm sure I was that arrogantly confident back then. I know I thought my mother was woefully out of touch (even though she was hanging with her girlfriends and going to Rolling Stones concerts). I suppose my girls feel the same way. On the nights I come unglued when they won't go to bed and I end up yelling until my neck vein pops out, they probably look at each other when I'm out of ear shot and say, "God, did you get a look at her pajamas? How nerdy can she GET??"
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